Bottomline: Few first loves’ last ending go past the group stages up to the pulpit or traditional wedding ceremonies it usually ends up in tears for majority of first time lovers end up being award winning motivational speakers if not professional self-love activists online and offline
Love is sick,love stories are sickly sick; sickly sick like the Kenyan government dancing to the tune of Corona Virus. Saddening is it!! All our attention is on the Building Bridges Initiative instead of the deadly virus which has undressed ever vibrant health sectors in first world forcing scientists to burn the midnight oil chasing shadows.
Do we have the capacity to survive Corona with our sickly sick public health system always in a state of comatose. For the first time our ruling elite won’t be able to travel abroad to seek improved medical services leaving us in limbo, corona has brought about equity in death when and if it strikes, maybe we are immune thats why flights from hotpots such as China and Italy land at will.
That aside, who saw it coming. Diamond Platinumz broke up with Kenyan celebrity Tanasha Donna? How these former love birds suffocated our social media streams with chirping tales of how all was well in their love life. Wedding bells sounded from afar. The power couple met two years ago giving us an impression of a bright future until the release of “jeje” song by Diamond which seemingly served as an end time song portraying diamond as a narcissist in the eyes of Tanasha Donna.
The novel; love gone sour affair stories always crop up before the sun sets we are treated to unending dramas offline and online. Cases of murder and suicide have been normalized in the society. Is it the perfect remedy? Some of these problems ,however arise from narcissism.
Wikipedia describes narcissism as the pursuit of gratification from vanity or egotistic admiration of one’s idealistic self-image and attributes, this includes self-fluttering, perfectionism, and arrogance.
It is also considered a cultural or a social problem. This can be loosely translated in Swahili as “kujipenda sana” .Enough of enlightenment, however let’s not mistake this with self-confidence which boosts our image to the outside world. Most relationships don’t meet their goals because one partner is a narcissist, am not acting perfect but when one has an inflated sense of importance, a deep need for excessive attention, admiration and lack of empathy for others, it’s time to seek help before the fragile glass of lemonade falls breaking into pieces.
“After I introduced her to my parents, I was told my father had another wife thus we were brother and sister” a tale of Kenyan lovers on the verge of marriage preparations, having dated for three years they felt it was right to cross the bridge,not the BBI we are used to.
An impossibility on realization that they were siblings. So what happens to them then if they’re not strong enough to handle the situation as it is, probably one party would end up committing suicide, depression or if worse murder.
The love predicament is terrible, first love being one of them. Fictitious romantic activities heavily borrowed from novels,films and soap operas Mexican or Philippines triggering the eagerness to feel love. Fifty Shades of Grey explains love life so practical that any teenage watching it would experiment, experiment is always the best teacher.
Few first loves’ last ending go past the group stages up to the pulpit or traditional wedding ceremonies it usually ends up in tears for majority of first time lovers end up being award winning motivational speakers if not professional self-love activists online and offline. Don’t get me wrong, all I mean is they die inside after a break up covering it up with quotes biblical and inspirational philosophical quotes. That which can’t kill you makes you stronger they will say….
Relationships could also be one way; falling for someone that doesn’t love you back, this is common with men. Is it sad living all your life loving someone yet not receiving the same in equal measure? Of course it’s difficult to draw a line between true love and sexual desire, but I’d say self-love is key.
How about the tales of exes? This ranges from how you relate with your ex,any probability of dating your ex. I have different views:
“I think am a guy who learns from his mistakes,believing in second chances which I can perfectly give my best. For me, dating my ex just makes the relationship stronger since we would have learnt from our mistakes, which is better than jumping on to another relationship and trusting someone from scratch, falling in love again is hectic. On the same note I would never date my friend’s ex because that may create tension on our relationship” Omar, a journalist.
“Personally I cut off all connections good or otherwise” Eric, a teacher.
“Fervently, after a break up, I opt not to treat someone who once was a source of happiness to me recklessly. I am bound to maintain the relations without intimacy and romance” Atebe, a graphic designer.
“Dating your friend’s ex is being desperate! How do you even start? Some of you are just crazy, however much you will want to justify your actions, just know that is not only desperate but also stupid! This shows you wanted him\her from the word go!” laments Florence an engineer
Dating exes can be controversial, in most cases it is not the best thing to do however, there are exceptions.
Doctor loves message; It is healthy to have a good relationship, however one that prompts one’s happiness should be avoided. Life changes, falling in love is a stage, trusting each other while resisting temptations will come a long way in making the relationship work. It is also important not to set the ball rolling until you are sure that is exactly what you want. Sometimes we choose to relate with a certain clique of individuals which is fine. Lastly communication means everything in a relationship, at times our parents will say no when it comes to dating but you can date when you are old enough to make the right decisions. When is one old enough anyway………………